Some days you win and some you lose.

July 13, 2018

 

Life sometimes feels like a game of football.

 

I have decided to be positive as much as I can be, and this is not easy for a person who has gone through most of his life as a ‘glass half empty’ sort of person. I have always been like it, I mean I could win £5 million and I would still find something to moan about. So why do negative thoughts become so over-powering? Lets take 2 days, any two. On the first day you can spend a lovely day out in the sunshine, nice food, good company, having a great laugh. You get home at the end of the day and you feel like today was a fantastic day. You wake up the next day and its cloudy, you feel tired, you are in a rush for work, traffic is bad, work is stressful and the day just gets worse until the point you fall into bed and are thankful that the day is over.

 

Now already the first day has gone from your mind, it’s forgotten, no matter how good it was, its a long gone memory. However the second day is still fresh on your mind when you wake up, the bad journey to work, the telling off by your boss, the stress of having to complete numerous tasks, the argument with your partner. This is why I spend a lot of time being negative, my mind is so busy thinking about the bad days it forgets the good days, it's as if the good memories are over powered.

But only I can control this, only I can change the way I think, how I perceive stressful situations.

 

This leads me to the point of the blog. How do I change my thinking, how do I remember the good days and forget the bad days? Well I don’t know, I do my best, but is is hard, its probably the way I am wired, but I am giving it a go. Last week I was at work, dealing with stressful never ending actions and tasks at work. The actions were over-whelming me. I was trying to get home on time, and on top of that my car was in the garage, so I was riding everywhere. At 7:30pm I had to ride 7 miles to a pub and then get changed to meet my brother and sister in law to have dinner. It was windy and uphill and by that time, I was really struggling. I thought to myself this is just my luck being in this position (granted I know there are people in a worse position than me) but then I thought to myself, its just my position in life. Then I started thinking, 1. To pass the time, 2. To keep my mind busy and 3. well because I needed a subject for a new blog.

 

My thought was that everyone is a football team, some people are Manchester City, some people are Blackburn and some are Luton. Everyday is a football match and you can have days when you score 4 goals and win and some when you conceded 5 goals and definitely lost. Unfortunately for some people they may start their life in the top division but due to a number of reasons, bad decisions, financial mismanagement, they end up falling down the leagues. Others start in the lower leagues and they climb to the top and stay there. They are success stories in life, they may have worked hard, they have taken their chances and they have had a bit of luck. Most people linger around the 2nd Division, they flirt with the 1st Division but they never really get near the top league.

 

Maybe I am here, I have a great life, a fantastic wife and children and a lovely house, but money can be a bit tight, I never always take my chances, sometimes I make bad tactical decisions and sometimes I am unlucky and just get beaten by the better team. But do you know what? I am happy with that, I am improving all the time, I feel that I am learning and I am starting to take my chances. Yes sure I will still lose games and draw games, but I know I am winning more. The key to this like any professional sports person, is to eat well, be active, be mentally fit and to keep working on your strengths and deal with your weaknesses. I need to emphasise the good days and remember them. I need to put bad days behind me more quickly and remain positive. So I finished the ride, got changed, and was thankful that I had the chance to burn off some more energy before enjoying a good meal.

 

I think I won that day 2-1. 

 

Life Coach, Cognitive Behaviour Coaching & Wellness Coaching


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Paul J Brown | Life & Wellness Coach | Workplace Well-being 

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